Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine

I had nightmares after that night. They were about Jagger. I couldn’t get him out of my head even if he was temporarily out of my life. Paranoia swept through me every moment I was awake and every moment I was asleep, I had to relive the times with him. I would wake myself either screaming or with Gabriel shaking me to pull me from the nightmarish slumber. Gabriel began to question if staying with him was the best idea. I insisted that it was and I truly did believe it was. He didn’t know my true feelings for him. I was learning to jumble my thoughts to where none of them made sense or to block them to where Gabriel couldn’t get anything out of my head. Sometimes I slipped but I was becoming very good at confusing him with my thoughts. It was amusing at times but other times, I just wanted him to know how I felt about him. It was too risky though. The slightest mistake could send me packing and I would have to go back home. As for school and Oliver…my grades had been slipping slightly each week due to my paranoia with Jagger. Oliver was barely speaking to me whether it be because of jealousy or anger. It was hard to read him. Gabriel offered to let me in on his thoughts but I refused to invade Oliver’s privacy like that even if the curiosity was about to be the death of me.
I decided I had had enough when I saw Oliver at school on a Thursday morning, talking to one of his friends from Astronomy Club. He ignored me when I sat down.
“Oliver.” I said calmly.
He didn’t turn around.
“Oliver. We need to talk now.” My tone became more commanding.
His friend stopped talking and looked over Oliver’s shoulder uncertainly.
“Oliver Wayne Stephenson. Turn around and look at me!”
Oliver turned, surprised at my tone. “What?”
“We need to talk, I said. Now.”
“What about?”
“Why are you ignoring me?”
“Why should you care? You have Gabriel, don’t you?”
I clenched my fists beginning to fume. “Yes, I have Gabriel. Is he what this is about? Gabriel? Oliver, you know you are my best friend. Why are you ditching me because of your jealousy?”
“I-am-not-jealous!” He exclaimed through his teeth.
“Yes you are! Why else would you be ignoring me? You are jealous that Gabriel and I have finally hooked up and now you are taking it out on me like it’s my fault. I’m sorry if you can’t be my friend while I have a boyfriend, Oliver! I’m sorry if you can’t handle that! Grow up! I am not into you like that and I never will be!”
I stood up and stormed out of the cafeteria, tears burning my eyes either from anger or from the memory of the obvious shock and pain on Oliver’s face. I saw Gabriel standing against the wall by the front door. He looked up and smiled a crooked smile in my direction. I tried to return the smile but my insides were twisting knowing that I could have possibly been giving up Oliver for Gabriel. I crossed the hall to stand with Gabriel. He touched my shoulder briefly.
“Oliver.” I said simply and Gabriel didn’t have to ask more. He could read minds after all.
“What happened?” he asked, pushing my hair from my face.
“I can’t talk about it. I’m opening my thoughts to you. Just read them.”
It was quiet for a moment as he scanned my thoughts for Oliver’s name. When he found what he was looking for, his expression turned sympathetic.
“You don’t have to choose between us, you know. Oliver will come around. Are you sure you don’t want to know his thoughts?” Gabriel said.
I shook my head. “Of course, I WANT to know but I don’t want to invade his privacy. I figured that if we are close enough friends, he will tell me what is bothering him…won’t he?”
I looked into Gabriel’s face. He seemed uncertain. “He’s just worried, Jade. Give his some more credit. Of course he’s jealous but he has a bad feeling about me…as he should.”
I glared at him. “What did I just say? Didn’t I just say that I didn’t want to know his thoughts?”
“That wasn’t his thoughts. That just was just a male detecting male instinct. He wants to protect what’s rightfully his. He did, after all, see you first and like you first."
“So that entitles him to be a jerk?”
Gabriel shrugged. “His pride is just hurt. Like I said, give him some time.” When the sentence left his mouth, I looked up to see Oliver walking towards me.
My body tensed and I noticed that Gabriel’s did as well.
When Oliver joined us, he too went a little rigid. “Gabriel.” He acknowledged with a nod.
Gabriel gave a nod in return before leaving us alone.
“Jade, I’m sorry. But I’m thinking we can’t be friends anymore.”
I could feel the shock spread through my body and how it traveled to my face with an unknown expression.
“I really am sorry, Jade. It will be as if we never met.” His face was expressionless. My eyes looked into his, pleading with him. He shook his head.
“Why?” I demanded in a voice that was no more than a choke.
Oliver shook his head. This was not happening. Oliver wouldn’t do this. Would he? Oliver was becoming more and more a part of me than I had imagined. I knew he was important but, he had a hold on my heart. He was a part of that. He was a part of me.
“Wow. You really do care.” He whispered.
Tears sprang to my eyes and I cursed them and looked away. “Of course I do, you idiot.”
He turned my chin to face him. I clenched my jaw, fighting back the raging waterfall of tears. “I love you.” He told me fiercely.
“What are you talking about? YOU’RE the one dumping ME.”
He bit on his lip and released my face. “Curious isn’t it, though?” His face leaned down closer to mine as if he was going to kiss me but he stopped just centimeters from my lips.
“Oliver, what is going on? You’re scaring me.” My vulnerability and my need for him were shining through now, embarrassing me.
“I’m sorry, Jade. I really am.”
He turned to walk away. “Oliver Wayne! What the HELL is going on? You are going to tell me right now!” I shouted, wiping tears off my face.
He kept walking. I didn’t go after him. I was too angry and hurt and confused. If he wanted to walk away from me, fine. But I would get an explanation out of him. Even if it killed me.